Rain, yoga, chocolate ...


Rain
Night is fitful. Restless. Dreams. Wake up and body is in pain all over, hasn't been this way in awhile. I know the pain has multiple sources. Try some stretches to wake up., to get moving. The dark clouds are heavy, not only outside, but on the head. The difference is that now I know that the dark clouds are on my head and I have to be mindful. It will take care. Humidity is high. I am not sure if the humidity is related to the pain.  Quarrels, separate quarrels, with the two clients who do not want to be clients which leave me feeling exhausted and the day has not started. The rewards for providing services to these clients are not money, but 'blessings' - except that sometimes there is confusion in understanding what is needed and what could be done.   Coupled with having to deal with a stupid personal health issue, the stress is subliminal.
Rain starts falling. I have to dry out some pieces of lego which I had washed and put to dry so I could give them away and which got wet. Mindless task but I think of breathing during it.  Rain falls, but the humidity still high.
A friend younger than me emails me to say that he could not reply to my response to his check in on me a few days ago. He had a heart attack. The man I know exercises and eats healthily.
Thinking of the other men younger than me who are dealing with health issues.

Yoga
I feel like lying down. It is mid morning. Energy not there. But I fight that urge. I know that the body stretches will help some of the tenseness, but not all. I go and do the yoga, leave the window open and hope some cool breeze will come in with rain drops on me. But rain falls straight, no breeze. The body sweats as I stretch, holding positions. Breathing to see if could breathe out the pain. Body feels better. Mind feels better.  
I am glad.. back in the day I would go and run regardless of the heavy clouds. But now is just stretching.

Chocolate
"That one is chocolate, with orange layers. That one is a truffle, pure cacao, with orange filling" the chocolate man tells me  I think, what the hell, why don't I buy both. But resisting the urge to binge on the dark chocolate is the same as resisting the urge to lie down when you should move. I choose one, with another.  Sit down outside the shop because the chocolate  tends to melt in my hand. Eat them slowly, mindfully.  One would have been enough, there is a rush to my head. Rain has stopped falling.
Clouds have moved and disappeared. Humidity is still there.

Email comes in with an offer of work and I say yes to it without worrying about it . I will worry about it when I start it. Other work, which will not have me quarreling with anybody and whose reward will not be 'blessings'.

Thankful that I made it through this episode, that at the end of the day the body feels less painful and less tense than it felt at the beginning.

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