Dear cashew..
Dear cashew
I don't normally go after you , but I am glad you came my way today as you are sweet and crunchy and I needed that.
I woke up this morning.. the night was okay.. deep sleep and I prayed that I could be useful, not make any mistakes like I did yesterday, and just move on with life.
Unlike the mistakes from yesterday, you were a welcome surprise today.
I am still mourning again, for the loss of what might have been with a loved one. I had grieved and recovered before.. but the restoration of contact seemed to indicate that there was some possibility and again I grieve..
Now is not a good time for grieving as it makes the other the other things worse.
I am grateful though, that you came my way. I wish though, as with so many other things, that even as I enjoy the time I spend with you, I am not attached to you and it doesn't matter if I never see you again.
I wish I could be as detached from other desires , including this desire not to keep messing up.
sigh.
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