Crashed mind, crashed body..
Image from https://openclipart.org/detail/221538/frantic-man |
The first place, the stress had built up, the stress was underneath though piling up on other things and I didn't realise how bad it was. I submitted.
I walked to the second place, Submitted and came out thinking that I could skip jump run and go and do other things like which I used to do years ago after high stress things like exams.
I could not move. Back felt stiff. Body felt tight. Legs heavy. Mind also feeling exhausted as I contemplated the next set of chores.
It was that kind of exhaustion which also prevented sleep from coming. I managed to move slowly to where I was going.
I accessed sugar which was stupid because I know that I should try to stretch.
I managed to move around.. go to places.. but all the time.. it was heavy. Fortunately there was a place with good music. It helped a bit.
I tried going down on the floor.. come on man, you have to stretch..
Stretching requires energy, it also releases energy.
Much as I need it.. I keep thinking.. let me try a bit at a time.. but it not working.
I do the list of tasks to be done in my head. Mistake. makes me more heavy.
Brain shuts down. Hoping that I would wake up feeling refreshed and energetic.
Wake up feeling worried.. the feeling is still there. I try bending and so to loosen up .. but even bending . it is not releasing the remaining tension which is holding back.
Thinking I should lie in bed and rest, but I have a feeling that rest is not what is needed. I have to loosen the body.. get it moving, but it seems I have to get my mind moving.
And my mind is not moving as fast as it should.. it seems to be whirling around in circles rather than just being steady.
I am fighting between sitting and doing nothing and getting on with the things to do But that stupid fighting is not good.
At some point I will move.
Comments
Post a Comment