Tub of wrinkled clothes..
The man asks what the plans are for 2015 and I cannot really answer as I am planning daily and replanning.
There is something about how the mind races through things which could be done.. kind of manic, but the body just wants to stay still.. and the various aches which might be brought on by the anxieties do not encourage any kind of movement.
There is ironing to be done, postponed a week now and the clothes are wrinkled now. Something about the futility of ironing.. clothes ironed, they get dirty, they get washed, wrinkled, and have to be ironed again.
Some tasks which are high priority get done.. bathing, brushing the teeth, cooking, eating, eating more, singing Ramayana at the mandir. Low priority tasks like exercising, cutting back on the food , planning a healthy diet and cooking it remain in the head.
Some days you look forward to events and then you think you can go, and then the time comes and it is easier to just sit and do nothing, and not go. Other times it is okay and perhaps the Universe selects which things are better to go to.
Conversations can happen, short ones. Emails are composed to friends and then deleted to avoid co-dependence and avoid the negativeness. Social media can be used because it is easier to just type when you want and not have to be present really.. and it is not tiring to move fingers alone.
It is moon light. Futility in the head as the alcohol thing comes up on the way from mandir as you are the only one in the minibus who does not drink and one of the young men asks 'if liquor did not exist, what would we have done? and the full page ads stare you to remind you of the stupidity of that kind of activism' In the manic moments, you think without moving about things which could be done.. all kinds of brain waves and so come about what could be done.. you imagine yourself on the road like the Groundings crew with a ... so how much will you not drink this Christmas.. and can you dance without drinking because there was a lady dancing with a bottle in her hand at the rum shop and apparently many people cannot dance without alcohol .
But the exercise is not done, and the tub of wrinkled clothes remains there with a few more thrown in .
So even as the body remains sluggish.. the thoughts race through, try not to get overwhelmed by things from the past which are really past and which cannot happen again; and also by racing and imagining how new activities could be done - plants trimmed, books sorted, new things learned, CV updated, experiments tried, carbs and sugar thrown away, one hour of exercise a day religiously, books read, work done, money received.
The ironing though has to be done first. And the cooking is done.
There is something about how the mind races through things which could be done.. kind of manic, but the body just wants to stay still.. and the various aches which might be brought on by the anxieties do not encourage any kind of movement.
There is ironing to be done, postponed a week now and the clothes are wrinkled now. Something about the futility of ironing.. clothes ironed, they get dirty, they get washed, wrinkled, and have to be ironed again.
Some tasks which are high priority get done.. bathing, brushing the teeth, cooking, eating, eating more, singing Ramayana at the mandir. Low priority tasks like exercising, cutting back on the food , planning a healthy diet and cooking it remain in the head.
Some days you look forward to events and then you think you can go, and then the time comes and it is easier to just sit and do nothing, and not go. Other times it is okay and perhaps the Universe selects which things are better to go to.
Conversations can happen, short ones. Emails are composed to friends and then deleted to avoid co-dependence and avoid the negativeness. Social media can be used because it is easier to just type when you want and not have to be present really.. and it is not tiring to move fingers alone.
It is moon light. Futility in the head as the alcohol thing comes up on the way from mandir as you are the only one in the minibus who does not drink and one of the young men asks 'if liquor did not exist, what would we have done? and the full page ads stare you to remind you of the stupidity of that kind of activism' In the manic moments, you think without moving about things which could be done.. all kinds of brain waves and so come about what could be done.. you imagine yourself on the road like the Groundings crew with a ... so how much will you not drink this Christmas.. and can you dance without drinking because there was a lady dancing with a bottle in her hand at the rum shop and apparently many people cannot dance without alcohol .
But the exercise is not done, and the tub of wrinkled clothes remains there with a few more thrown in .
So even as the body remains sluggish.. the thoughts race through, try not to get overwhelmed by things from the past which are really past and which cannot happen again; and also by racing and imagining how new activities could be done - plants trimmed, books sorted, new things learned, CV updated, experiments tried, carbs and sugar thrown away, one hour of exercise a day religiously, books read, work done, money received.
The ironing though has to be done first. And the cooking is done.
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