Futility of stopping rape..

Stop Rape  on the 25th November and thoughts all over about the progress made and unmade .

• Hearing  men say that Mr Hicken should not have apologised because he was trying to say that women should dress decently and he was only trying to help women.  Guyana's moral crisis apparently is about how women dress rather than how men behave.  Hearing this from places which are surprising and not surprising. The desire to control women's bodies seems more than the desire to prevent rape. And the talk about rape and violence against women becomes a cover for saying 'violence is bad, but if you behave better , that would not happen to you'
• Plenty apolgies around the world to 'people who might have been offended'.. Don Lemon the black gay CNN News Anchor who 'As a victim, should known better' when  and the white DJ from the BBC  and the Jamaican senator former Attorney General whose 'sackcloth and ashes' apology is ridiculous .
• In Guyana, the Attorney General's private fantasies come to life and his contempt for women is revealed . An apology is issued on his behalf by a preacher man. Preacher men like to tell women want to wear like the young Pandit who said that 'women should not be blamed' even though he believes as many do that 'vulgar dress entices men to rape'
• In addition to the men who want to rape, are those who would defend those urges as saying they are 'natural' Apparently something is wrong with the men who could desire without raping and there is a blind ignorance that rape happens all over. There is a statistic I cannot find .. from Guyana where the number of cases in Guyana seemed to imply that the greatest risk to any girl from rape was a male relative.
• The Sexual Offences Act of 2010 has been challenged in court and so it seems we might not have a sexual offences act to use if anybody wanted to report rape.  The travesty of the Preliminary Inquiries apparently are there to stay apparently
• Another man asked this week, how could something which is seemingly non-partisan such as sexual violence and domestic violence become political. Well it does when it depends on who the rapist /beater is and so two PPP women MPs say that they are disgusted by the Attorney General's comments while they note his apologies and it seems continue to work with him. So really and truly, there will be no roughing of the waters and life will go on as 'normal' in the PPP with the lusting privately and the public apologising and the acceptance of those apologies - forgiveness.
• The justice system does not allow for high convictions of rapists. Rape is one of the crimes with high levels of impunity. A marijuana seller has a greater chance of going to jail than a rapist.  Reporting rape makes sense in which the victim can get justice. Some persons talk about restorative justice which is not about money compensation since the rapist goes on again and again.
  
   

What actions though to stop rape and other forms of gender based violence?
The masculine contempt for what is considered feminine is part of humanity and there seems to be a futility in changing that contempt.

• Guyana Police Force must publish their procedures for dealing with sexual offences and let the public know what happens in the breach. Police who do not want to deal with sexual offences should not deal with them. Set up the Special Victims Units 
• The Sexual Offences Act seems to be in a mess with the paper committals. There is supposed to be a National Task Force working on a national plan. That plan should be available for the public to participate in it.
• Challenge rape culture. Rape Culture in Guyana which is about street harassment. Rape culture about the inability of the hospitals and the Ministry of Health to publish or implement any protocols regarding rape and other forms of gender based violence.  Rape culture about how we cannot talk about advertising which fuels sexism which underlies rape culture, and beauty pageants which seek to create ideas of perfect womanhood in violent ways by destroying the 'contestants' for being too stupid or too fat or too clumsy or whatever adjective is used - sometimes by those who believe that women should dress decently to avoid rape.
• A woman wrote of one experience with holding her key in her hands as the car drove up next to her,. her mind on aiming for the eyes in case anything happened. Years ago, a rape alarm was used during day time in my Uni parking lot to prevent an abduction.  I stopped counselling children after I found myself telling a girl to kick her father in his balls the next time he came to her for sex.   Safety planning and self defence discussions should happen, but not in a context in which people are blamed for 'not defending themselves properly' . 
• Shun the rapists and those who abuse the justice system. I do not want my death announcement on CNS Channel 6. I have not been to CNS Channel 6 for any recording of any TV programme. I walked out of a Men's Empowerment forum where a pandit who molested a relative who did not want to complain was speaking on behalf of Hindus.  

Healing
More rape survivors are talking about rape when they get a fair hearing. Many rape survivors have chosen not to go down the justice route, thinking of their own safety instead and getting past the rape. There are stories which have to be shared.  Counselling is not readily available in all places.  Rape survivors have different strategies for survival. Any listener has to appreciate those strategies. The core of listening is to remove the shame and the blame from anybody who has experienced rape.

Stopping rape is about ensuring consequences for those rape and think about raping others.