6 things that seem to work..
A woman told me that when she came off her depression meds, she started to do the little tasks she had been ignoring and paying more attention to her surroundings.
A critical aspect of managing mental health and depression is being able to work with routine . Sometimes though, routine is not possible and work is needed to adjust to rapidly changing circumstances.
So while managing the dark clouds. and not dwelling on the things which did not work out. I could laugh at some of the things which worked..
1. Resisting cravings for sugar, letting off steam
The bottle of white sugar on the table is there.. easily accessible. Sweet cocoa on my mind and sweet biscuits and sweet tea with orange peel and nutmeg. But I made a resolution, no sugar for awhile. And every time I reach out and pull my hand back I feel good. Other sugar things around.. there is a chocolate biscuit twice which I say no to, and vermicelli cake sent for me 'because I like sweet'. Other cravings, at times, I want to reach out and to connect with people to 'let off steam' but I hold back on those cravings, and calm down a bit and try to get back my head on track.
2. Singing
The Ramayana Gole was invited to sing in Bath Settlement.. three hours of driving and I wanted to stay in but somewhere in this Buddhist book I finished reading 'When things Fall Apart ' about facing fears etc, and so I go up.
Awesomeness in some of the music from the kirtan group. Awesomeness when a stranger sits down next to me and we sing together.. something about this weird connection of the Ramayana through the years.. Georgetown and Bath Settlement.
3. Suicide prevention
A 16 year old student walked out of Saraswati Vidya Niketan , went home, bought poison and drank poison and died a few days later. Much liked/much despised/much feared Swami Aksharananda has involved in suicide prevention talks.
Another organisation gloats that a man came to them for help.
As I manage the dark clouds, I keep thinking , if I felt that I wanted to die and kill myself, who would I go and talk to?
Not the organisation who would gloat about it, not any individual who would use the power dynamics of helper/helpee , not any private practitioner who charging money which I could use to buy things to eat, not any harassed public practitioner who not able to deal with the misery including their own, not any of the well-meaning people who would want to propose solutions and then get vex if the solutions don't work...
And while I might be rational, many young people especially act on impulse . Should there be counselling standards set in Guyana for the care? Who would propose ethical standards for helping organisations and individuals who do not disempower those they want to help?
4. Pacing, yoga
Restlessness at the computer and lack of focus, In the days before the feet pained, I would have gone for a walk or run on the seawall. I feel irritated that the work is not getting done and then I just say to hell with it. I end up pacing around the yard and it calms a bit.
One day I did not feel that I could move my body and do the yoga. The next day the yoga routine is perfect.. I could not believe that my head could touch my knees and even though there were fears that another time would come when I would not be able to do this (like the walking and running), I did it. I wondered if the Diclofenac slow release enabled this but I let go of that thought.
5. Saying No, Saying Yes
A colleague wanted to bounce ideas and I postponed that to next week. An invitation to two social events, and I want to say no to both but I say let me try, I can always leave.. a kind of saying no and saying yes. Other things come up.. a possible work assignment for something I am not qualified for at the moment and I say yes, rather than no. Using instincts.. and knowing I could change my mind later - saying yes, saying no, saying maybe
6. Being useful
Casual connections and questions being asked for information and other things. Being useful , in a kind of low intensity way.. but feeling glad that I could maintain connections which do not require any energy to follow up.
Writing this and thinking whether I should write this, and planning the day ahead while also thinking it would be nice to 'rest' and resisting the idea of 'rest'.
A critical aspect of managing mental health and depression is being able to work with routine . Sometimes though, routine is not possible and work is needed to adjust to rapidly changing circumstances.
So while managing the dark clouds. and not dwelling on the things which did not work out. I could laugh at some of the things which worked..
1. Resisting cravings for sugar, letting off steam
The bottle of white sugar on the table is there.. easily accessible. Sweet cocoa on my mind and sweet biscuits and sweet tea with orange peel and nutmeg. But I made a resolution, no sugar for awhile. And every time I reach out and pull my hand back I feel good. Other sugar things around.. there is a chocolate biscuit twice which I say no to, and vermicelli cake sent for me 'because I like sweet'. Other cravings, at times, I want to reach out and to connect with people to 'let off steam' but I hold back on those cravings, and calm down a bit and try to get back my head on track.
2. Singing
The Ramayana Gole was invited to sing in Bath Settlement.. three hours of driving and I wanted to stay in but somewhere in this Buddhist book I finished reading 'When things Fall Apart ' about facing fears etc, and so I go up.
Awesomeness in some of the music from the kirtan group. Awesomeness when a stranger sits down next to me and we sing together.. something about this weird connection of the Ramayana through the years.. Georgetown and Bath Settlement.
3. Suicide prevention
A 16 year old student walked out of Saraswati Vidya Niketan , went home, bought poison and drank poison and died a few days later. Much liked/much despised/much feared Swami Aksharananda has involved in suicide prevention talks.
Another organisation gloats that a man came to them for help.
As I manage the dark clouds, I keep thinking , if I felt that I wanted to die and kill myself, who would I go and talk to?
Not the organisation who would gloat about it, not any individual who would use the power dynamics of helper/helpee , not any private practitioner who charging money which I could use to buy things to eat, not any harassed public practitioner who not able to deal with the misery including their own, not any of the well-meaning people who would want to propose solutions and then get vex if the solutions don't work...
And while I might be rational, many young people especially act on impulse . Should there be counselling standards set in Guyana for the care? Who would propose ethical standards for helping organisations and individuals who do not disempower those they want to help?
4. Pacing, yoga
Restlessness at the computer and lack of focus, In the days before the feet pained, I would have gone for a walk or run on the seawall. I feel irritated that the work is not getting done and then I just say to hell with it. I end up pacing around the yard and it calms a bit.
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| Image from http://www.indianmirror.com/games/yoga/yoga-varicose.html |
5. Saying No, Saying Yes
A colleague wanted to bounce ideas and I postponed that to next week. An invitation to two social events, and I want to say no to both but I say let me try, I can always leave.. a kind of saying no and saying yes. Other things come up.. a possible work assignment for something I am not qualified for at the moment and I say yes, rather than no. Using instincts.. and knowing I could change my mind later - saying yes, saying no, saying maybe
6. Being useful
Casual connections and questions being asked for information and other things. Being useful , in a kind of low intensity way.. but feeling glad that I could maintain connections which do not require any energy to follow up.
Writing this and thinking whether I should write this, and planning the day ahead while also thinking it would be nice to 'rest' and resisting the idea of 'rest'.
Finding someone to talk to, that a hard one. Embarrasement at going to a stranger at hospitol for help, family, people you know saying all you need is church. .. Jesus will make it better ..... ive found *light* reading helps.
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