The yoga of methem

House of Flavours sells the methem in a nice steel bowl. If you take fish, you cannot have it in the calabash.

The methem is warm and comforting. It is too much really in the bowl, but it is nice to eat.

Eating is one of the things which helps to take the mind off of the depression and the feelings of being stuck in a rut and not able to concentrate.

Eating though is not good, well you should eat healthy stuff so there is a war always with the cravings for sweet - chocolate, jam which will make the sugar levels worse; or for the things which will hurt the teeth like the nuts and cheese stix.

There is ice cream always but you are not going to give up yet, give in really though giving in is always there... and you think about the other people who probably do not suicide immediately but who slowly drink, smoke, eat themselves through all the wrong things which will make living bearable and which might also make things unbearable.

The body is stiff all the time so the walk to loosen the body for yoga did not work out. The mind has to adjust to that disappointment that at least the achievement of the yoga routine will not happen because parts of the body say no.

The celebration will be smaller, that at least some of the yoga is done, not as much as in the past when you used to do it after the two mile run and a hard days work.. but now .. after a 15 minute walk, it seems that it cannot work.

And so the constant adjustment - to the changes which either cause the depression or are made worse by the depression.

Studying is useless now as memory is not working and learning is left to the front of the brain so small short tasks are easier to do .. reading is difficult and that is why it is not good to indulge in the short sensations of eating.

The courses have to be cancelled and the feelings of disgust have to be suppressed in favour of feelings that it is now survival time.

The mind and the body are sluggish, a kind of plodding along, pushing through to get through things and indulging in the things which require the least brain work as a way of saying that you are surviving.

This has to be pass.


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