Chutney
The inclusion of Soca Monarch Jumpo in the Chutney thing has generated all sorts of interest and the Presidential Hopefuls and other stakeholders have had no choice but to reflect on this latest issue of critical importance to the people. Not only is Jumpo is a likely winner, but Jumpo is not your regular Indo or Afro or Whato- Guyanese.
From the only decent political party fit to govern..
Candidate 1 : noted that the Chutney competition monarch should be decided by secret ballot and that the constitution for the chutney competition should be carefully read. Other chutney singers might not want to agree with the secret ballot , but you cannot judge the singer by the number of boos, waves, bottles pelted or illegal copies played on the music carts.
Candidate 2 : asked to see the question in writing first 'What do you think of the Chutney competitors and Chuntney this year ' and said that he likes sweet mango chutney with his cornflakes since it improves his bowel movements' .. we apologised and repeated the question and said.. oh okay, the waist movements them..
and that he likes how Jumpo and him seem to have similar DNA and that if Jumpo could become the monarch then he too could become the monarch,
Candidate 3 : said that Pa and then later Ma had told him that he should be leader and be President but that blasted chutney music was playing too loud so the others did not hear it so now he has to through all kind of tribulations so he not too fond of chutney right now.. even in the damned rum shop you have to shout over the chutney music when campaigning
Candidate 4 : said that he hoped that his sugar workers would have taken part more actively in the chutney competition, he was concerned at rumours that the chutney finals moved to Essequibo because the ruling party friken that the sugar workers would boycott the finals if it was held in Canje. Further this candidate rejected the claim that it is not true that meant to be a pacifying circus..chutney as everybody knows is hot and spicy and stimulating -so he not sure if he will be here though since the Chief Chutney Singer might be carrying him out of the country
Candidate 0 : blew smoke in our direction and said that it did not matter who won the competition anyways, the only difficulty with chutney is being able to understand the lyrics if you do not speak creolese and also that none of chutney was going to be anti-government
The other political party which is the only one fit to rule this country
Candidate 1 : said that the soldier training left him straight and stiff backed so he could no longer win' to chutney but he sorry he did not take Jumpo to do his jingle for the young people
Candidate 2 : Said it was sad all this emphasis on chutney now, chutney was never part of the Economic recovery Programme and chutney makes no money for anybody really except the people selling tickets at the gate and the alcohol
Candidate 3 : No comment since candidate 3 is not even President and he flying out the country already and not turning up to meet the people who might vote for his song at the competition,
Candidate 4 : said that Hope and Faith are all that are needed for the right chutney singer to become monarch and that everybody in Guyana should feel free to sing as much chutney as they want and realise their potential to become a king or queen or whatever they want to be
Candidate 5 : hoped that the chutney competition would be judged by young people and not old people, since the old people have all kinds of history about who should sing chutney and who should not sing chutney and who should sing soca and who should not sing soca and that there should be more chutney competitions focussed on youth and young people, but young people want more than chutney and young people are crying out for opportunities to sing chutney
The All For Chutney candidate said that corruption corruption corruption would mar the chutney competition and hope that the Indian people are not afraid of African and Mostly-African-Guyanese moving into to tek over Indian ting like chutney
Bishop Erc is hoping that Jumpo don't win , but get a high space, because he not able with another complaint from the Indian Departures Committee about how the proud Indian tradition of drinking rum and win'in to Kanchan is being tek ovah by others .
Some of the rumshop voters did not hear the question since they were as a fight at the juke box.. somebody wanted kanchan and another one wanted sundar popo and another one said that we should get local singer but other shout and say the rum local why the hell the music gotta be local too.
Some of the members and non-members of the Association of Chuntney Dancers And Artistes are concerned that yet again, persons whose ancestors never heard of chutney are falling prey to the drum and dance thing and hope that Jumpo would sing about ancestral lands, the dumpsite, the crime, shared prizes for the chutney competitors, not say that 'it ok' 'it ok'
From the only decent political party fit to govern..
Candidate 1 : noted that the Chutney competition monarch should be decided by secret ballot and that the constitution for the chutney competition should be carefully read. Other chutney singers might not want to agree with the secret ballot , but you cannot judge the singer by the number of boos, waves, bottles pelted or illegal copies played on the music carts.
Candidate 2 : asked to see the question in writing first 'What do you think of the Chutney competitors and Chuntney this year ' and said that he likes sweet mango chutney with his cornflakes since it improves his bowel movements' .. we apologised and repeated the question and said.. oh okay, the waist movements them..
and that he likes how Jumpo and him seem to have similar DNA and that if Jumpo could become the monarch then he too could become the monarch,
Candidate 3 : said that Pa and then later Ma had told him that he should be leader and be President but that blasted chutney music was playing too loud so the others did not hear it so now he has to through all kind of tribulations so he not too fond of chutney right now.. even in the damned rum shop you have to shout over the chutney music when campaigning
Candidate 4 : said that he hoped that his sugar workers would have taken part more actively in the chutney competition, he was concerned at rumours that the chutney finals moved to Essequibo because the ruling party friken that the sugar workers would boycott the finals if it was held in Canje. Further this candidate rejected the claim that it is not true that meant to be a pacifying circus..chutney as everybody knows is hot and spicy and stimulating -so he not sure if he will be here though since the Chief Chutney Singer might be carrying him out of the country
Candidate 0 : blew smoke in our direction and said that it did not matter who won the competition anyways, the only difficulty with chutney is being able to understand the lyrics if you do not speak creolese and also that none of chutney was going to be anti-government
The other political party which is the only one fit to rule this country
Candidate 1 : said that the soldier training left him straight and stiff backed so he could no longer win' to chutney but he sorry he did not take Jumpo to do his jingle for the young people
Candidate 2 : Said it was sad all this emphasis on chutney now, chutney was never part of the Economic recovery Programme and chutney makes no money for anybody really except the people selling tickets at the gate and the alcohol
Candidate 3 : No comment since candidate 3 is not even President and he flying out the country already and not turning up to meet the people who might vote for his song at the competition,
Candidate 4 : said that Hope and Faith are all that are needed for the right chutney singer to become monarch and that everybody in Guyana should feel free to sing as much chutney as they want and realise their potential to become a king or queen or whatever they want to be
Candidate 5 : hoped that the chutney competition would be judged by young people and not old people, since the old people have all kinds of history about who should sing chutney and who should not sing chutney and who should sing soca and who should not sing soca and that there should be more chutney competitions focussed on youth and young people, but young people want more than chutney and young people are crying out for opportunities to sing chutney
The All For Chutney candidate said that corruption corruption corruption would mar the chutney competition and hope that the Indian people are not afraid of African and Mostly-African-Guyanese moving into to tek over Indian ting like chutney
Bishop Erc is hoping that Jumpo don't win , but get a high space, because he not able with another complaint from the Indian Departures Committee about how the proud Indian tradition of drinking rum and win'in to Kanchan is being tek ovah by others .
Some of the rumshop voters did not hear the question since they were as a fight at the juke box.. somebody wanted kanchan and another one wanted sundar popo and another one said that we should get local singer but other shout and say the rum local why the hell the music gotta be local too.
Some of the members and non-members of the Association of Chuntney Dancers And Artistes are concerned that yet again, persons whose ancestors never heard of chutney are falling prey to the drum and dance thing and hope that Jumpo would sing about ancestral lands, the dumpsite, the crime, shared prizes for the chutney competitors, not say that 'it ok' 'it ok'
Candidate 2 : asked to see the question in writing first 'What do you think of the Chutney competitors and Chuntney this year ' and said that he likes sweet mango chutney with his cornflakes since it improves his bowel movements' ..
ReplyDeleteBrilliant Vidya!