Cyclone..
My mouth was feeling woolly and my body feeling a lil beat up. The blasted Tastee barbecue chips I ate, the hard crunchy spicy thing at 1030 pm like it rest on my stomach.. a doctor had told me that this craving for hard crunchy chips is a sign of dealing with some kind of anger.. I had a whole pack of plaintain chips and two of the Tastee things.. and then went and sleep.
The whole week I been fighting off the heavy feelings, trying hard not to go down the sweet way. The humidity is high. I do the suryanamaskar and my mind is racing with all the things.. i struggle to maintain focus on the postures and movements to keep my mind off the things which hold me back. One thing at a time I say.
There is a cyclone due and it sounds ominous. The moon was full this week.
Work starts.. one major task takes all morning to do, but at least it is done. The afternoon, I start the next one.. it is taking a bit long. In the middle of the afternoon, the phone rings. The voice asks if I am busy.. and instead of saying.. go to hell, I am polite and I give the information which is requested..the voice which used to confide and talk about love but which changed..
I am craving chips and I open another pack of chips.. but one at a time. I say no, I want to do the yoga early .. cant eat. I do the yoga though, but even as i stretch and focus.. I feel like the endorphins are not moving fast but I keep at it.
The seawall beckons.. the rubbish is there, it gets worse every time I go out. But the tide is nice and the breeze is nice and I try walking but still feeling like I should be just sitting down and staring at the sea like one or two of the 'mad' people. Reach UG, and think about running back, at least a little bit but the legs are saying hell no.
But I try, a lil way.. and then keep walking .. sun is setting slowly, one of the clouds is shaped like a tornado thing which you see in the pictures. My mind is racing with things.. the funding thing for next year, wild idea to try.. in the moments of heaviness sometimes there are these manic things which happen and I think, heck why not. what have I got to lose.
I think that I am glad I do not have children because I would not be able to deal with children while trying not to sink.
I meet a woman who I have not met a long time.. and the conversation, banal.. funnily is good, maybe the endorphins are kicking in now.. I come home and finish the plaintain chips, and then eat banana and pawpaw for the sweet. but I do not through sugar on them. I not doing too bad.
The whole week I been fighting off the heavy feelings, trying hard not to go down the sweet way. The humidity is high. I do the suryanamaskar and my mind is racing with all the things.. i struggle to maintain focus on the postures and movements to keep my mind off the things which hold me back. One thing at a time I say.
There is a cyclone due and it sounds ominous. The moon was full this week.
Work starts.. one major task takes all morning to do, but at least it is done. The afternoon, I start the next one.. it is taking a bit long. In the middle of the afternoon, the phone rings. The voice asks if I am busy.. and instead of saying.. go to hell, I am polite and I give the information which is requested..the voice which used to confide and talk about love but which changed..
I am craving chips and I open another pack of chips.. but one at a time. I say no, I want to do the yoga early .. cant eat. I do the yoga though, but even as i stretch and focus.. I feel like the endorphins are not moving fast but I keep at it.
The seawall beckons.. the rubbish is there, it gets worse every time I go out. But the tide is nice and the breeze is nice and I try walking but still feeling like I should be just sitting down and staring at the sea like one or two of the 'mad' people. Reach UG, and think about running back, at least a little bit but the legs are saying hell no.
But I try, a lil way.. and then keep walking .. sun is setting slowly, one of the clouds is shaped like a tornado thing which you see in the pictures. My mind is racing with things.. the funding thing for next year, wild idea to try.. in the moments of heaviness sometimes there are these manic things which happen and I think, heck why not. what have I got to lose.
I think that I am glad I do not have children because I would not be able to deal with children while trying not to sink.
I meet a woman who I have not met a long time.. and the conversation, banal.. funnily is good, maybe the endorphins are kicking in now.. I come home and finish the plaintain chips, and then eat banana and pawpaw for the sweet. but I do not through sugar on them. I not doing too bad.
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