Men liking/loving men...
I have had some fantastic, not so fantastic and bad encounters with men the last few weeks, mostly young men. International Men's Day is how some men designated 19 November, but it was not observed.
An amazing guy I know has a friend who mourns the lapse in their friendship. This guy took a break from life it seems, and if I am lucky I meet him on the seawall and we can gaff about books and philosophy. I never get to tell him that his friend misses him for fear that I might misrepresent the feelings.
Another guy asks me what I do when I am depressed. He feels useless.. and I want to tell him how much I hold him in high esteem for the work he has done and the cuss up he has taken bravely. But that might just freak him out, so I encourage him to go exercise and get moving. Fortunately he does, and I dont think I have to tell him that he is one my heroes... one day when I am drunk I probably will.
Another man called me, deeply concerned about his friend in another country who is depressed and the concerns sound to me a bit more than concern.. and even if I told him that he sounds like he in love with the guy, he would cuss me and tell me not gay. But the expressions were that, deep love and concern which can only be expressed in confidence, since some people might not understand apparently!
Another man came to the picket on Thursday, young man trying a new venture of participating in picket with people who are sure that they right about the need to have the legislation against child sexual abuse. The man though, not sure, and I cuss him up for not standing up to his employers whose tee shirt he wearing and which will prevent him from picketing.
The women say we sounding like man and wife quarreling on the roadside.. maybe we do because I realise that the reason I am cussing him up is that I am disappointed in him not being able to be independent.. and he accusing me of things which another man who now and then told me he loves me (Christian way) said that I dont listen to other people.
A young man I know falls of his motorbike, and he is drunk and riding, and nobody has told him to go home and not drink and ride. I did. He keeps telling me he is a failure, alcohol does that apparently. He messed up, and other men will buy drinks for him, none will tell him he has a problem. He talked about going to AA, alcohol wearing off. No man will take him though, easier to take him to have a few beers.
Two men I know who argue about culture and so on seawall.. is me introduce them to each other, one tell me we have to take a beer before the holidays. He say that I am too extreme, that in life we need a few drinks. I say no problem, I like being extreme.
Another man who thinks homosexuality is disgusting and homosexuals are pedophiles tells me my picture on the chat window look like I selling beer. I ask him what he want me to look like. He tells me that I should get a professional picture, shave my face, that I am handsome without the hair on my face.. and he sound serious too.. and I thinking, lord.. things changing, even the homophobic men like men.
So yep, a lot of men are liking men, and loving men.. not much we get to talk about though
An amazing guy I know has a friend who mourns the lapse in their friendship. This guy took a break from life it seems, and if I am lucky I meet him on the seawall and we can gaff about books and philosophy. I never get to tell him that his friend misses him for fear that I might misrepresent the feelings.
Another guy asks me what I do when I am depressed. He feels useless.. and I want to tell him how much I hold him in high esteem for the work he has done and the cuss up he has taken bravely. But that might just freak him out, so I encourage him to go exercise and get moving. Fortunately he does, and I dont think I have to tell him that he is one my heroes... one day when I am drunk I probably will.
Another man called me, deeply concerned about his friend in another country who is depressed and the concerns sound to me a bit more than concern.. and even if I told him that he sounds like he in love with the guy, he would cuss me and tell me not gay. But the expressions were that, deep love and concern which can only be expressed in confidence, since some people might not understand apparently!
Another man came to the picket on Thursday, young man trying a new venture of participating in picket with people who are sure that they right about the need to have the legislation against child sexual abuse. The man though, not sure, and I cuss him up for not standing up to his employers whose tee shirt he wearing and which will prevent him from picketing.
The women say we sounding like man and wife quarreling on the roadside.. maybe we do because I realise that the reason I am cussing him up is that I am disappointed in him not being able to be independent.. and he accusing me of things which another man who now and then told me he loves me (Christian way) said that I dont listen to other people.
A young man I know falls of his motorbike, and he is drunk and riding, and nobody has told him to go home and not drink and ride. I did. He keeps telling me he is a failure, alcohol does that apparently. He messed up, and other men will buy drinks for him, none will tell him he has a problem. He talked about going to AA, alcohol wearing off. No man will take him though, easier to take him to have a few beers.
Two men I know who argue about culture and so on seawall.. is me introduce them to each other, one tell me we have to take a beer before the holidays. He say that I am too extreme, that in life we need a few drinks. I say no problem, I like being extreme.
Another man who thinks homosexuality is disgusting and homosexuals are pedophiles tells me my picture on the chat window look like I selling beer. I ask him what he want me to look like. He tells me that I should get a professional picture, shave my face, that I am handsome without the hair on my face.. and he sound serious too.. and I thinking, lord.. things changing, even the homophobic men like men.
So yep, a lot of men are liking men, and loving men.. not much we get to talk about though
You need to back up a bit. Nothing is wrong with being concerned about the well being of a friend (who happens to be the same gender as you are). David loved Jonathan as a brother and we are given numerous illustrations where men sacrificed themselves for the sake of their friends. I know of men, tough men who cried for a fallen comrade. Nothing is wrong with that. Men are social creatures and as such are drawn to each other for companionship and dependency (both male and female). If this wasn't the case then we would all be hermits living on our own mountains or huts or where ever hermits find solitude.
ReplyDeleteThe problem is that we allow a few men to dictate or define how we should treat each other, these men's men may be more about brawn then brain so they don't know any better.
As an individual I'm free to express myself the way I see fit and if I feel genuine concern for a friend then I have the right to set him straight. What kind of friend would you be if you allow your brother/friend to fall by the wayside. Are we not our brothers' keepers?
Note agape and philios are not the same as eros. So men loving men in the first 2 instances are completely normal. Erotic love between men is an abomination.
Mercenary, your military-inspired, shoot to kill, barely camouflaged white domination, weapons of mass destruction, evoking image prevents me from putting my name to this comment. your visual vocabulary suggests that you are ready to kill your perceived enemies. Count me as one. I think your suggestion that there is norm is scary. For one, it is reminiscent of Nazi politics -- what are do you advocate for those who do not fit the norm??? Violent attack? Exile? State oppression? Here's a novel idea that will make your head spin --what about dialogue between the dominant (people who hold the same social Darwinian views like yourself) and gay/lesbian/those in-between? Isn't it time we moved away from biblical stereotypes? Welcome to the 21st century Mercenary.
ReplyDeleteAnon. live your life the way you choose. I'm not your judge.
ReplyDeletePeace.